A Love so complicated
by Irvine Leonhart
Summary: The story of two men, one who's emotionally dead and needs love, the other is willing to give this love. But the road to that love is so complicated. Will it be KaneRVD? Discontinued.
1. Dream

Disclaimer: Explicit M/M content, if you don't like that stop reading already. I wont tolerate bone idol people. ^_^ Still here? Good! Hope you all enjoy it! Please tell me what you think. I do not own any characters mentioned and none of these events have happened all I own is the plot. Story set on the Tuesday of the raw Kane won the tag title.  
  
Blistering cold winds bashed against the windows, desperate to get inside the warm plane as the crew waited on the few wrestling superstars still awake. The plane's two seat row aisles were spacious enough for Rob Van Dam to kick back, and relax. His feet were crossed on the head rest on the chair in front of him and his arms were nested nicely against the back of his head. He silently wondered who'd be facing himself and Kane now they were the new wwe tag team champions, different teams raced through his head but as he had begun to notice lately he couldn't keep train of his thoughts. His concentration would last to the time limit of a goldfish before he'd start to think about Kane. Kane, his tag team partner, the one person he can relay on, and the only person he could call a friend. He saw something special and unique in Kane. Nothing someone could say they had done, and that was overcome some unbearable obstacles in his life that some people would of just given up hope. Kane never, and that's what first attracted Rob to Kane; the fact that he was still here after everything he had been through. Smiling at his feelings he looked to his left, fast asleep. Kane was excruciatingly tired before and it was no surprise to Rob that he was out like a light. He was curled up as much as a seven-foot man on an aeroplane seat could be with his head leaning slightly inward.  
  
Eagerness and longing tingled in Rob's fingertips. Not knowing if it were to touch Kane's pouted lips or to take off his mask as he watched him in soundless sleep. Sitting himself upright with his feet now firmly on the floor, he watched fervently at the rise and fall of Kane's chest through his black Slipknot t-shirt. The necklace chains draped seductively around his neck. As Rob observed, his brown coloured orbs widened as he imagined himself placing passionate kisses along Kane's neckline, his tempted hands crawling on Kane anywhere they could. Then both their hungry mouths greedily pressed their lips together hard, their tongues exploring every inch of each other they could. Rob could feel the sweet and intoxicating taste he thought Kane might be like. Rob couldn't help but feel a tight pull inside his trousers. Drawing apart, Rob went back to Kane' neck. "Hey Rob" Kane said through smiles. "Hey Rob" "HEY ROB!" Rob's opened his eyes and realised he had fallen asleep. (What a weird dream. I mean I don't even look at Kane that way let alone think of him like that) He looked up as he realised someone wanted him His sight met with the amused face of the wwe raw heavyweight champion Triple H. He was grinning while leaning on Kane's chair. He chewed his chewing gum through his grin for a moment longer then decided to comment.  
  
"Hey Rob. Nice Kane dream, I mean dream? Or should I say Kane-tasy, opps I meant fantasy?"  
  
"I wasn't fantasying about anyone"  
  
"Oh yeah? Well a friend that belongs to you doesn't seem to think so. Haha" As he walked off laughing Rob, to his embarrassment he looked down at a really big erection. Redness scrawled all over his face, looking around every other superstar was asleep apart from Triple H who was now seated comfortably back next to Ric Flair. Standing quickly he was desperate to get to the toilet, thank god there was one just opposite their seats. Carefully trying not to wake Kane he frowned and grunted as Triple H called out "Watch it you might poke Kane's eye out with that thing! Haha!"  
  
An hour full of relieving himself of sexual frustration, cursing himself because of the sexual frustration and straining himself not to get sexual frustrated again past. The superstars were all now fully active but weary as they reached the waiting terminal where they'd have to wait for another plane to take them to where Raw and Smackdown where to be held. "Ladies and Gentlemen, we regret to inform you that flight number 205, the wwe plane is delayed, this delay should be at least half an hour. Thank you for you patience"  
  
"Just our luck" Kane mumbled  
  
"Yeah I know" Rob replied shaking his head as they both sat down.  
  
"They better have at least one decent magazine." Kane said with hardly any emotion. Scanning through the piles of magazines on the table in front of them.  
  
"I don't think they supply Kerrang! You'll have to go to a shop and buy it"  
  
"Bollocks. That means moving" Kane shut his eyes, still tired and filled to the brim with jet lag. Rob laughed and suddenly felt a call from Mother Nature.  
  
"I'm just off to use the wazz man, a need a real long piss"  
  
"Too much detail" Kane frowned waving him off, his eyes still firmly shut. Rob chuckled; flicking threw his pockets he noticed he had a few dollars on him, passing a shop he smiled. (I'll buy kerrang for him and I might just treat myself to a mars bar) Feeling content he headed to the public toilets near the shopping area of the airport. Not knowing he was being followed.  
  
Gently, he checked his bruised elbow in the mirror as he dried his hands. A frown creased across his face when he saw a swollen mass of blue and red. He'd taken the fall right after he had got to the back just after his match were he won the tag titles with Kane. Remembering how stupid he was not to see the giant sign saying 'wet floor' he turned to leave as someone walked in. Rob had nothing against him, so he smiled and reached out for the handle of the door. "Rob." Rob turned around to look at the veteran. "If I were you. I wouldn't play to hard for emotions. He isn't good at handling them, you know, doesn't like being told he's loved. It frightens him off, so unless you're willing to lose the only friend you have then I'd keep your feelings to yourself."  
  
"Dude. What did you just say?"  
  
"You heard. And you understood too. I'm just thinking for ya' kid don't commit to him too much, with feelings is what I'm saying. I've warned ya" Ric Flair left leaving behind a bemused Rob. "What the hell just happened?" He questioned to himself. "He must have been talking about Kane. I think" His normally lay back, un-confused features where now very confused. 


	2. Arguments

He strolled through the aisles of the gift shop heading for the counter carrying the magazine for Kane and chocolate for himself. He stopped when a gold trinket caught his eye.  
  
*The day had been long, now they were finally at the hotel where they could finally get some sleep. "At least we got to share a room, I didn't fancy sharing one with Triple H or someone like that" Rob laughed a little as he put his suitcase on his bed. (That would have been a nightmare) Silence. He turned to Kane and saw him looking out of the window. Rob went over and stood next to him. He tapped his arm. "What you thinking dude?" Kane looked at him for a brief moment before returning his sight to out the window. "Nothing"  
  
"Okay. I never noticed you had so much jewellery dude. It's all very."  
  
"Freakish" Kane sad, again no emotion was ridden in his voice, just a hint of sadness.  
  
"No! NO.it's cool. What's it all mean.or don't they have meanings?" Kane turned to look at the man who was smiling and who actually looked interested. "Why are you bothered?" His tone was inquisitive but still angry in a slight way.  
  
"Can't I be interested? Come on man, tell me about your necklaces." Still confused Kane took one off then gave it to him. "This one is the Alcantagram. The Alchemist's symbolic struggle for spiritual supremacy bound by serpents and roses and encircled by a bone resin ring of essential sigils." Rob tried hard but still couldn't understand what the bigger man just told him, but it sounded cool to him.  
  
"And what about these two? Can I see them?" Kane again removed the necklaces and gave them to Rob letting him see them close up. "The sword one is a Demon Killer Incant sword. The sigilic spell engraved into the blade is fatal to all infernal slaves when wielded by the gifted ones whoever they are. That one is the Ankh of the Dead. The ancient symbol of life and immortality, in the form of a vampire's dagger." Gazing at the Pendants in his hands a feeling he'd never experienced before shook his body, feeling a strength flow through his veins that he felt was to powerful his stare of awe at the objects turned to fear. Handing them back to Kane he watched silently as he tied them back onto his neck. "That went way over my head, I understood none of that. But it all sounded so cool dude. What about this?"  
  
He frowned angrily as Rob picked up his hand to inspect the ring. A large, black Austrian crystal heart with what looked like demons or gargoyles all the way down both sides made an imposing feeling inside Rob. "It's a symbol of doom and emotional death" Kane snatched his hand away scaring his partner. (Why does it all have to be depressing?) A big smile crossed Van Dam's mouth. "I'm glad we had that conversation. Now I know what sort of stuff to buy you for you're birthday presents!" (Birthday present?) Kane said nothing.  
  
Rob saw Kane bow his head with a great deal of sorrow in his eyes. Rob knew Kane must be lonely, and was never shown happiness, well except when he was it turned sour on him. He placed his hand on Kane's and smiled before pulling away while he had the machine's attention. "Hey listen, we've been friends for a while now but I still feel as though a really don't know you" Rob tried to sound cool like always even though he was a little nervous. "Then leave" Kane's voice was low and a tone held to it as if to say "Like everyone else." Rob picked this up immediately. "No! NO! No.no I want to know you. Lets go out for a drink one night, and we'll talk."  
  
"There's nothing to talk about."  
  
"Yes there is. Dude I like what I know of you, but I want to know more. About your childhood and your past and stuff I'm."  
  
"You don't want to know anything about my child hood or my past!" Kane growled. Rob was taken aback by Kane's sudden emotional outburst but it didn't faze him. "Why don't I?" Kane kept silent as usual. He didn't look at the smaller man. He folded his arms and hugged himself slightly. A loud banging on the door took Rob's sight of the taller man. He reluctantly went to answer it. "Hey Jericho"  
  
"Tell Kane he's staying at my room tonight. I am on my own and I would like my boyfriends company" Jericho sounded pissed off about something. "And tell him if he doesn't I am not speaking to him." (Boyfriend? Kane and Jericho.?) Rob turned back into the room but made sure he was quiet. Kane was changing his top and to Rob's disgust there was a huge discoloured bruise on his side far worse than his elbow. He pulled another t-shirt on a plain red one, removed all his jewellery and put them in his bag. He looked at Rob before leaving, saying nothing. (Pissed off Jericho+ slipknot top and gothic jewellery + upset Kane= bruise?) Rob frowned angrily. He slumped onto the bed hoping he was very wrong. Kane had left his bag and some paper caught the eye of Mr Monday night. (I can't invade his privacy.) He took one of the pieces. (Just read a few words) Sexy I'm so sorry for pushing you again. Are rows are getting worse but I don't want us to spilt. I love you and I hope you still feel the same. I know its 2003 and we've been dated since invasion but I want you to know my feelings are the same as when I first set my eyes on you. If I get mad at you I swear I don't mean it, if I lose my rag and push you over and over again I swear I don't mean it. I'm sorry. And I promise nothing bad will happen again, just promise me you'll dress like normal people. Love you Jericho xxx  
  
* "Listen, I was hoping to spend some time with Rob" Jericho was holding Kane while kissing his neck.  
  
"Why!" Jericho snapped up and looked directly into his eyes. "Don't you want to see me? Aren't I good enough!? IS ROB VAN DAM better than me!" Jericho pushed himself away from Kane, rage bubbled away in his fists. "No!" Kane shook his head and looked at the floor. Frightened Chris will leave him.  
  
"Well, we'll stay here then" Chris scooped Kane's chin in his hand and planted a kiss on his lips. "You don't need anyone but me. No one else would want you, but I do. I want to keep you forever to myself" 


	3. Some home truths

Rob looked at the trinket and frowned. He'd bought it for Kane but never had chance to give him it last night. He had spent the night alone, went to the gym at one in the morning unable to sleep. He'd returned back to the hotel room, the room he was supposed to share with Kane but he was alone. So taking it to his advantage, Rob tried all Kane's jewellery on. He'd admired it all with his gaze filled with wonder and awe. "It's so different, I like it." Still looking at the golden amulet he placed in into Kane's bag of belongings, followed by his jewellery that Rob had slept in last night by accident. But that wasn't what worried Rob, all night, all he thought about was Kane, Kane's body, his personality, the late night conversations they had had previously. He realised that when he thought about Jericho pushing him, using him, he got angry. And when he thought about Jericho with Kane.romantically.he was jealous. "Oh God..I think..I'm falling in love.." He whispered out loud, no one there to hear him, but it didn't stop him continuing. "I knew I couldn't lie to myself any more" Sighing, he was waiting for the big man's return. He re-reads the note Jericho had given Kane over and over. He jumped when the door was pushed violently open; he quickly put the note back and grinned. His grin disappeared when Kane slowly walked in, his face looking to the floor.  
  
"What's up? You alright?" Rob walked over to Kane fast with his arms out stretched a little. Kane pushed him with his right hand; he fell backwards and landed on the bed. "Umph" He shook his head then looked up. "Kane, what's gotten into you?"  
  
"You won't want to know," He growled before grabbing his bag. Rob frowned, angry that Kane, after these months could not trust him with why he was emotional. Not thinking, not considering the consequences Rob jumped fast and gripped Kane's wrist. He opened his mouth to speak, but was left stroke dumb with shock as Kane suddenly emitted a painful scream. He pulled away from Rob's grasp. "DON'T EVER GRAB ME BY EITHER OF MY WRISTS AGAIN!" He'd never been yelled at like that before, he sunk back frightened, but decided that they only way to gain Kane's trust is to pursue and be determined, determined to show him he cares. Kane turned to leave but was met with Rob running in front of him.  
  
He swiftly grabbed Kane's right arm, then struggled to lift the sleeve of his long top. Kane put up a difficult fight; they ended up wrestling to the floor. Kane's size and weight were a big disadvantage for Rob. Eventually, Kane overpowered him and slammed him hard, his back hitting off the floor. Rob looked directly into his colourful eyes and saw they were glazed with tears. He didn't want to but he wrapped his spare hand tightly around Kane's left wrist. Another scream rang through the hotel room. Rob tugged at the sleeve till it moved up, revealing slash like marks on the flesh; Kane didn't fight as Rob looked at the other one, which was the same. Sicken feelings swirled around in the pit of his stomach as he stared at his wrists, they looked like they had been hacked at for hours, but hours a while back. Kane freed his hands, regained his composure turned, and tried to leave before the smaller man had a chance to speak.but didn't manage it time.  
  
"Don't runaway from me"  
  
Kane hung his head. (I'm tired of fighting though)  
  
"I know you must be tired of fighting" Rob said with his shut as he thought some more.  
  
Kane stared at him oddly. (How did he know I just thought that?) "But you're not fighting alone anymore.I'm with you. You know- you're tag partner, hopefully, other than Jericho I'm you're best friend-."  
  
Kane winced. "I.broke it off with Jericho." Curiosity sprawled over Rob's face, (So that's why he's upset. But that doesn't explain the marks-) "Can I ask why" Kane breathed deeply. He didn't answer. Rob exhaled loudly, he wasn't frustrated, and he knew Kane was a hard person to get feelings out of. "So.the cuts.when?"  
  
"Last year, about July time, my brother found me." He laughed forcefully. "Mark doesn't trust me anymore. Says he can't leave me alone, that I have to be with someone, anyone. They still hurt. ..A lot...when someone touches them hard enough anyway"  
  
Rob finally stood up; he wrapped his arms around his waist and gave him a little squeeze. "I got ya' from now on." He pulled away, not wanting to smother Kane in affection. Kane smiled a small smile; though his tears were still there he smiled for Rob.  
  
He smiled at himself in the mirror; he brushed his hair to the side "Woo! Flair you are the man!" He winked before Hunter could speak a remark, the door to their hotel room burst open.  
  
"Hunter Hurst Helmsley you are so dead!" Chris Jericho ran into the room, and jumped onto the unsuspecting World champion, his rage obviously showing violently in his eyes. His fingers dug into Hunter's skin as he chocked him. He gagged and gasped for air, coughing and struggling to get free from Jericho's tightening grip around his throat. "You bastard you made Kane dump me! I always knew you were jealous!" Ric managed to pull Jericho away and hang onto him while he kicked and squirmed in the air.  
  
"Listen I had no idea Kane dumped you! Not until you just said."Hunter grinned..(Kane's single..? Sounds good)  
  
"Oh.well.I thought you might of convinced him.I know you fancy him an all but.I don't know why he dumped me!"  
  
"What did he say?" Hunter wrapped an unconvincing arm around Jericho.  
  
"He just.said he didn't think it would work...HOW DARE HE DO THIS TO ME!" Chris started knocking the bottles of aftershave and wine, he threw the T.V at the mirror before Hunter knocked him out with his title belt. Hunter looked at Ric, who was more than surprised at the bust in. "you did tell Rob to stay away from Kane right?"  
  
"Yeah Champ"  
  
"Good, 'Cos I've got a plan that will work a sure shot. All we have to do is." 


	4. Late night drinks, Brothers and pills

Rob held onto Kane tightly in the ring, they had just successfully defended the tag titles against Chief Morley and Lance Storm in the rematch. Kane picked the titles up and gave Rob his, still latching onto the big red machine Kane smiled down at him. "Great match RVD"  
  
"You to BRM" Kane shook his head while Rob looked at him with a cheesy grin on his face. The crowd went nuts, cheering for the champions while they walked to the back. The sweat dripping from Rob, he wiped his brow not noticing the five-time wcw champion sitting on a box waiting for them.  
  
"Hey guys, listen, there's a new bar that's just opened why don't the two of you, get changed and celebrate there?"  
  
Rob and Kane looked at each other, they shrugged then turned back to Booker. "Sure, good idea"  
  
"But Kane, can Rob catch up with you? I need to speak to him." Kane nodded and left the two to talk.  
  
* The nature boy sure could pack a punch. Coach sat himself up against the cold wall in the locker room of the raw champion. Ric ran his knuckles under some cold water, before turning his attention back to the interviewer. "Rob will be in his locker room now, getting ready but Kane's told me to tell him he aint feeling well, so he won't be going out tonight. Only I can't see, I'm a real busy person. So I need you to tell him that, pronto! Wooo! Now go, get out" Ric picked up Coach by his shirt then threw him out the door, slamming it shut behind him. Coach stood up shakily to his feet, he rubbed his head of the blood carefully not to open the cut anymore before heading to see RVD"  
  
* Sighing he looked at his wristwatch, 9:15, he'd been waiting almost an hour. Very angry and slightly drunk he stood to leave but a hand was placed on his shoulder. Triple H put his title belt on the table then looked at Kane's empty glass. "Need another? You look like you could use it" Hunter walked to the bar as Kane watched, confused at Triple H's actions. This is the man who accused him of necrophilia, why was he being so nice? Kane didn't know whether to stay or to just go, he ran his fingers through his long hair before looking away from Hunter to the title lying next to his own tag title. "Thanks." Hunter said to the bartender, he looked around curiously no one was watching and most importantly Kane wasn't looking either. He slipped to white tablets into one of the glasses before sitting back down next to a very suspicious Kane.  
  
* A black antique clock chimed Midnight in the five star hotel room. His tears had not dried as he squished the pillow closer to his chest. "He probably had a reasonable explanation for cancelling the drink, like coach said; he said he was feeling sick. Why though? Why couldn't he phone me himself, or tell me to my face? He didn't have to get coach to tell me! Damn it!" Throwing the pillow at the table by the TV set a crystal pink vase shattered and sprinkled its tiny pieces of crystal teardrops onto the floor. Rob defiantly wasn't feeling cool, his feelings were distraught and his mind was running erratically around in circles. "That's it! I don't care if he's feeling sick I am going to his room and he can explain the real reason why he didn't tell me himself."  
  
* Kurt wrapped his fingers through his hair, as the two of them gazed lovingly into each other's eyes. They always did this no matter what hotel they were in they'd sit in the lobby till midnight then retreat back to their rooms. Taker pulled his head away from the Olympic gold medallists chest and looked up a questioning look was in his emerald eyes. "Hey, did that son of a bitch just walk in here with my Kane?" Kurt nodded, he looked at his boyfriend curiously. "Do you mind if I go check it out?"  
  
"No no, I'll be in our room" He winked when they went their separate ways. He walked slowly; he heard Hunter's voice. "You're so beautiful Kane." Mark's eyes widened. The door was unlocked so he carefully crept in, he watched as Triple H gripped tightly to Kane, kissing him with a passion so full of sex and lust. It was Undertaker needed; the fury inside him was so high it was unbelievable. He approached them quietly, and then struck. He pushed his brother to the floor startling The Game.  
  
His eyes burnt into his skin like scolding water. Unjust thoughts plagued his mind while his attention focused on the body of his younger sibling. His raged filled gaze fixated on the man he'd caught in a passionate embracing kiss with forbidden territory. Cowering on the chair in the corner, completely forgetting he was suppose to be the toughest son bitch on raw, he was desperate to regain composure and help the Kane back to his feet. Stirring movements from the big red machine made him feel more confident to move near him. Looking at the tall man stood menacingly made an exasperated sigh escape the mousy blonde haired mans lips. Standing shakily to his feet he refrained himself from purposely looking at the brother of his love. Gingerly, he edged closer to the big red machine. As if at the speed of light, Undertaker locked his grasp tight around his brother's wrist and heaved him up to his feet. Kane struggled but was no match, the drugs had got a hold of Kane's whole being and was unable to pull away.  
  
"Mark get off me" Undertaker's eyes snapped wide open and stared at Kane. Kane's eyes were clouded and weren't focusing very well; his voice seemed slightly slurred.  
  
"You've got him pissed senseless. Oh now it makes sense. Kane doesn't want to have anything to do with you!"  
  
"Well it didn't seem that way did it huh? He was enjoying that kiss just as much as I was"  
  
"Don't you mean the drink was, Kane wouldn't touch you boy if he was paid millions" Hunter's breathing deepened with his rage boiling over profusely. Kane wriggled out of Takers grasp and shot for the door, as he opened it he looked at the two men arguing about him. "I am here you know...it's not like I'm dead!" He left the room heading for his own. Falling against his door he slid down and sat on the floor, looking at his hands in front of him they were blurry and moving even though he was positive he'd kept them still. An uneasy feeling encircled his stomach as he fumbled for his room key.  
  
Rob left his own room and breathed deeply walking down the corridor but he suddenly stopped dead. Squinting he frowned then tilted his head to the right. His gasp was loud as he saw Kane lying on the floor outside his door. "Kane!" 


	5. A friend believes, understands, accepts

A whisper, a name, escaped his thinning lips. Jade eyes sparkled with worry, the worry of seeing him lying so still, ne'er unmoving.  
  
It had been such a shock, to find him slumped over outside his door like he was. He had not came round when he shook him, or spoke to him, instead of waiting he took the key and opened the door, though he struggled, he managed to get the bigger man into the room, and onto the old style bed. Kane had watched his movements, dizzy with the quickness of Rob's motions, rushing from place to place trying to find something that would help his friend. "Stop moving so fast, I'm gonna be sick" Rob tuned from filling a glass with water, Kane was right, He'd just been sick. After throwing up Kane seemed to be picking up. He wasn't as dizzy, and his hot and cold flushes were calming down. So Rob decided to get some answers. "What happened? How did you end up like this dude?" A roll of thunder emitted from the blackening sky, turning Kane's attention. The crack of the lightening rang through their ears and lit the room for a brief second. "I waited for you....you never came. Triple H...had a few drinks"  
  
Rob looked stunned; he'd gone to the bar? "How many is a few?"  
  
"Dunno. I remember suddenly feeling really depressed, like I used to. All my horrid memories...my past came flooding back to me. Hunter comforted me. Kissed me....my bro came they argued I left"  
  
The scenario was falling into place in Rob's mind. "I'm gonna kill Triple H, and that damn Ric Flair!"  
  
"Loneliness....the fear....hate...dread...my past. I tried to forget! The people who had left me, abandoned me..forgot me. I tried to move on but it keeps happening, over and over. I thought you were different"  
  
"I am!"  
  
"No Rob, you're just like everyone else." He shut his eyes as they had started to cry, something he hadn't done since being a small child.  
  
He had fallen asleep shortly after these words, leaving Rob to sit in them, like sitting in a hollow tree. His skin seemed to shimmer as it contrasted with the silk ivory sheets. Watching the rise and fall of his chest it was a definite reminder of the plane ride previously. A kiss, soft and gentle as a rose petal falling onto skin, and then he opened the long, thin white curtains and pushed open the double balcony doors. The strong wind howled against his warm red cheeks from the tears. He folded his arms to block out some cold, as he leaned against the railing, watching the thunderstorm over in the distance. The feelings Kane had mentioned, were far from what Rob felt, for Kane. Tenderness....compassion...adore... affection...love  
  
* Grasping the bottle in his large hand he carefully read the label. OXYCONTIN. Emerald eyes grew wide with fear and anger. He looked at the man picking himself up from the floor. "You....better not of used these on Kane" The world champion cupped his own chin and searched for blood. Reached up to his own bottom lip, pulled away and inspected his hand. The burst lip had bled profusely and was already enlarging, "What if I have-.."  
  
"WHAT IF YOU HAVE!? THIS STUFF CAN KILL IF YOU'RE NOT IN NEED OF IT! DID YOU PUT SOME INTO KANE'S DRINK!"  
  
The Game did not answer.  
  
* A chill encircled his body, his eyes opened as the dead of the night fell around him. Stumbling off the bed he stood still, trying to focus. He tripped and fell onto his bag. Something fell out. Picking it up he looked confused, this wasn't his. A gold medallion that opened.  
  
A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future and accepts you today the way you are.  
  
He turned it over; a small sticker was placed on the back. To Kane from Rob.  
  
He hurled himself up, a silhouette of a figure stood on the balcony. The moon shinning around him, the silence was broken. The silhouette was crying. 


	6. Prayers by moonlight and broken lifts

Thunderous black clouds parted ways like dark satin curtains, revealing the brightness that is the moon. His cold hands tried away more tears that were sticking to his even colder face, it didn't help much though as he still carried on crying. He leaned against the railing and looked up to the midnight sky. His words, gentle but riddled with sadness, his prayer, emotional. "God. What did I do? Please, tell me. Am I that bad as a friend? Is that why I've never had them? I was always alone....like Kane." He paused then continued with his voice slightly lower "This may sound selfish, but please make sure Kane's alright, he's all I've got....or maybe I've lost him"  
  
Biting his bottom lip, his eyes still glazy, he looked to the floor as more sobs emitted from Rob Van Dam. Not really a man of emotion, he wondered whether putting a comforting hand on his shoulder would be enough, or too much. Slowly, almost shyly, he reached out and touched Rob's shoulder. Causing him to jump with shock, thus Kane drew back just as quickly. The martial artist tried his eyes and smiled sheepishly. "Hey Kane, didn't know you were up dude" Kane looked up, his left eye made Rob think about the full moon, watching over them. In Kane's usually gloved right hand, he was clutching something tightly; raising it up he opened his fingers back for Rob to see the trinket. "Thank you, it's cool"  
  
"Cool" Rob echoed.  
  
"Why were you crying?" Kane was concerned, it took a lot to make him care about someone but somehow Rob had made him care. "Tell me please...if you tell me, I'll tell you something"  
  
Rob chuckled but was soon sad again. He sighed heavily. "I was just upset, because I'd hurt you" Kane nodded, suddenly, he wanted to embrace Rob pull his smaller frame closer and hold him there. "Okay then, I'll tell you this then...you haven't lost me"  
  
Rob looked up his smile was back and his eyes wide with happiness again. "Cool" He cheekily said. "Hey, when you were asleep you're brother came in, he demanded to know if you'd been sick. I said you had then he said Good make sure he drinks plenty of water then left. Strange or what?"  
  
"He is strange, thinks his my bloody mother" Kane rolled his eyes then smiled, Rob smiled back but his face became serious fast. He contemplated giving Kane a hug, would it be too much? Clearing his throat of any embracement his face reddened as he looked to his feet. "Kane, can I give you a hug?" (Dude, that sounded so ridicules, I am such an idiot!) His thoughts were all over the place as Kane stood silent. ".....yeah" There was a pause while Rob tried to get his head round the situation. (He said yes! What' the hell am I talking to myself for? I'm wasting valuable hugging time!) Shuffling forward a bit he wrapped his arms around his waist and rested his head on his chest. Kane's arms were loosely by his side, he felt wanted for the first time in a long time, so without thinking his arms wrapped around Rob and they both stayed there, pressed together lovingly. Pulling away, Rob didn't care anymore it was now or it would never happen. Reaching up he brought Kane's head down lower and placed his lips gently against his own. Kane watched Rob in disbelief, his initial reaction was to pull away, but it faded....he liked it. Closing his eyes the two kissed, longer until the passion, love and lust was so high the two were drunk with want, not a sexual want, but a want, a need for each other's love. They separated, chest heaving Rob smiled. Kane opened his mouth to speak but was silenced by Rob's lips once more. The only witness to true love blossoming was the moon.  
  
Gradually, his eyes opened to the bright morning sun. Still wearing his clothes from the previous night, Kane realised he was also, still wearing his mask. Even though they had kissed and slept in each others arms, he still hadn't shown Rob his face...could he show him it? Would it put him off? Did it put Jericho off? No. So why should it put Rob off? He breathed deeply it was always hard showing people his face for the first time. He sat up from where he and Rob had held each other close all night, leaning over the table there was a note.  
  
Gone to get breakfast. Rob xxxx  
  
"NO NO NO! Rob banged on the lift doors; he kicked and punched furiously at them. The lights had gone off and the lift had suddenly stopped. It had broken down, Rob was stuck. "NO!"  
  
Three long hours past, and Kane couldn't take anymore. He knew it was too good to be happening to him. Why should he be blessed with someone nice? He changed quickly into clean clothes, fighting back the tears that swelled in his eyes, he stuffed the old clothes into his bag harshly then left the room, and the feelings he hated were back again, claiming his soul. Hurt....anger...a broken heart. Rob had just used him, like everybody else, he fancied some sex and Kane was the only one there, unfortunately he never got it so he left, not wanting to stick around with a freak like Kane. Not looking where he was going he bumped into someone.  
  
"Sorry" He mumbled before trying to leave, a hand outstretched and grabbed his upper arm, preventing him from going.  
  
"Kane, are you alright? I've been so worried, I heard you had past out near your room, are you sick? Is something seriously wrong?" Jericho's eyes showed his concern was true.  
  
Kane shook his head he answered sternly. "I was just drunk, it was nothing"  
  
"I love you. I want you back please Kane! I've been nothing without you. Come back to me, please"  
  
Looking down at his former lover, he thought about Rob, how he'd somehow made Kane love him even though he was with Chris, then, uses him and throws him away like a failed exam paper. He looked deep into Chris's icy eyes and saw what he thought was pure love, devotion, guilt for the bad things he'd done before, and forgiveness. Unfortunately, Kane was too blinded by the idea that, even though the someone wasn't who he really wanted, someone loved him so he didn't see what was truly there. Anger, jealousy, control, sex, and power. Jericho knew Kane was strong physically, but he wasn't emotionally, which made him gullible, and Jericho thrived on manipulating Kane. 


	7. A false promise and emotions running wil...

His knuckles whitened as his grip was toughening on the hard head board. His ocean like eye's rolled into the back of his head and his long blonde hair was thrown back as he tossed his head about, moaning with satisfaction. He wrapped his fingers into his boyfriends long, brown curls then pulled him sharply up. "Kane, listen." He panted. "I know me and Christian are challenging you for the tag titles tonight" Kane was silent, he forget he was still the champion with Rob. "And so I've been thinking, maybe because you aren't talking to Rob, maybe you could drop them to us? I mean you don't have to but with you not speaking to him and me being you're boyfriend again, it would be nice wouldn't it?"  
  
Kane turned and looked at the plain walls. He would be the first to admit it would be a big help not to be champion with Rob, he could go and challenge Hunter for the world championship, release some revenge out on him in the process. A feeling deep inside though, a nagging feeling, was telling him to say NO, stay with Rob in the ring, see how it goes. "I'll think about you"  
  
"Aww. I knew you would" He kissed Kane's nose, then trailed down to his mouth. A rough kiss followed, Jericho biting at Kane's bottom lip then sucking cruelly. "I swear I've changed. I promise"  
  
* "Christian, you need to go out in a minute, you sure you know what I've asked you to do?" Chris Jericho tensed up Christian, whose boyfriend Edge was still in Toronto after breaking his neck, Christian was also a fellow Canadian but most of all, he was probably Chris's only friend. "Yeah I got it, relax it's in the bag" Christian's music played and he left behind the black curtain to the ring area.  
  
Lazily kicking his feet, trying to at least look as if he was warming up for the match, Rob couldn't help but hate himself. Kane was sure not going to be in a good mood. He'd spent the whole day yesterday trying to find Kane; he'd asked lots of people if they had seen Kane. But none of them had. After three and half hours of being locked away in a lift Kane had took his bag and left the room, leaving no note or no clue to where he'd be. Picking up his title belt he heard Chris Jericho's music which meant he'd be out next. Taking a deep breath of air and releasing it he walked out.  
  
"Oh what a Thunderous chokeslam to Chris Jericho! Kane's definitely been a foul mood tonight" J.R noted  
  
"Yeah, he hasn't even been acknowledging his own partner!" Jerry commented in his happy go lucky manor.  
  
"Five star frog splash!" J.R shouted  
  
The referee counted the pin fall and Rob's music played as the fans cheered loudly for the tag champs. Christian wasted no time in running to the back. Kane grabbed his title belt and immediately left the ring, Rob chasing after.  
  
"Kane! Wait up"  
  
"Why? You got up and left in a hurry so I don't see why I can't"  
  
"No Kane what happened was I was in the-..." Before he could finish Chris Jericho appeared looking quite cross.  
  
"Kane, a word in you're shell like, I've asked if we can speak in the GM's office, more private" He glared at Rob. Watching Kane walk away with his so called ex and leaving him standing there feeling isolated, cold, unloved, unwanted. This isn't what he wanted, he longed for the chance to hold Kane close and tell him he loved him. But that chance was shattered. Slowly, as if not wanting to move, he turned to his and Kane's locker room and entered. His feelings meant nothing anymore, never in his life had Rob Van Dam ever committed himself to someone as deeply as he done to Kane. He'd vowed ever since his bullied and troubled childhood that he'd never love someone, but as soon as he saw Kane when ECW invaded, Rob would be lying if he said he didn't find him sexual alluring somehow, but Rob being who he was, he brushed away the feelings, only for them to come back stronger than ever, proving that everyone needs love.  
  
"You said you'd let me and Christian win!"  
  
"I did not, I said I'd think about it and I did, I'd rather you earned the chance to have these, like we did"  
  
"I'm you're boyfriend, you're meant to love me enough to give me them belts dammit!" there was an awkward silence, that was soon filled by Jericho's voice again. "You know, I meant it when no one else would want you" He slyly grabbed Kane's chain and kissed him hard crushing his lips to his. "Now do you believe me, not even that stoner RVD wanted you" Jericho said bitterly.  
  
"He is not a stoner" Kane snapped in Rob's defence. He bowed his head though, Chris was....Chris was right.  
  
*He slumped onto the bench, reached over for the nearest bottle of water and tipped the warming liquid over him. Soaking his hair and drenching his face. He looked at the belt he still clung in his hand. Did this mean anything now Kane wasn't interested in his friendship? He looked over to wear Kane's stuff was, not in it's usual place next to him, but far over in the corner on the opposite side. "Oh my God" He dropped his title and walked over to Kane's gym bag. He knelt down on the floor, picking up what was left of the slipknot t-shirt. Shredded bits of the black cloth were spread over the floor, three necklaces, the three Rob had held in his hand and had wore for that night, smashed into tiny pieces. The ring, broken into two, the black crystal heart destroyed the pieces just left for Kane to find. The door handle clicked and the door was pushed open, Kane walked in but stopped dead at the sight before him.  
  
Authors Note: The beginning of this chapter is to show you the difference between making love, and just plain using for sex. Chris's wasn't telling him how much he loved him; instead he was discussing a plan to get himself a title at Kane's expense. Plus, I tried to show you that Chris's kiss wasn't as loving as Robs. I'm not to sure if the small argument between Chris and Kane ended well, I may re write it, it did need to sound as though Kane was succumbing to Chris's mental manipulation Read and Review please and tell me what you think! 


	8. Metabolic

I don't own any characters mentioned, or the two songs used, Metabolic is owned by slipknot and slow chemical is owned by finger eleven! Read and review! I love reviews! Tell me what you think!  
  
The darkness that had once encircled his life was now crawling back, trapping him inside the only thing he was scared of, he was scared of himself.  
  
The hired white car was parked as far away from the other wrestler's cars as possible. Slamming the door before starting the car up, he span backwards then shot forwards leaving the arena. He hadn't stayed long enough to hear Rob's exploitation; he was fed up of people walking over him. He clicked the cd playing on, turning the volume up from 30 to 80 he didn't want to hear himself think, he let his tears fall freely down his covered face and allowing his bleeding thoughts to be drowned out by Metabolic.  
  
Fail - suppressing every feeling  
I'm in so much pain  
I have every fuckin' right to hate you  
I can't take it!  
  
The hardest part was knowing that I could never be you  
Now all I do is sit around and wish I could forget you  
  
Kane still cried; crying was always something Kane had seen as weak which Kane had always hoped he wasn't, but this time, he just couldn't help but cry. He remembered how Rob had made Kane feel at Christmas, at the royal rumble, how he'd stayed with him after he inadvertently choke slammed him at no way out, and how they had clung to each other after winning the tag team titles, then, how they had clung to each other that night. Chris never loved him, but Kane only knew that now, why he took him back, his broken heart would never know.  
  
The rain hammered down hard on the wind screen, blurring his vision even more. The night outside was filled with party goers laughing and drinking, enjoying themselves with friends. While Kane was breaking mentally, his mind unable to adjust to all that was happening. Chris was right though, no one would ever want him, and maybe he should become the monster everyone says he is? Maybe he should show them what it was like to feel the pain he has felt for years? Maybe, he should show Rob what it feels like to be mentally and emotionally dead.  
  
Who are you to me? Who am I to you?  
Is this a lesson in nepotistic negligence?  
By default, you are my only link to the outside  
Psychosomatic suicide  
Where were you when I was down?  
Can you show me a way...  
To face everyday with this face - goodbye  
  
That verse was enough to send him mad; it was making him picture Rob in his mind. He tried to blink back the tears, opening his eyes... bright lights....gripped the steering wheel, jarring it hard to turn....more lights. A crash louder than his music echoed, followed by another. The white car skidded, being pushed by the breaking truck. His body twisted side ways, neck cracking, glass shattering, blood splattering over the dash board. The pain wracked his body, brutally crushing his insides, the blood burst out from his mouth, his eyes closed. The two trucks had finally stopped; they still had the front of the white rental car crushed between them. Kane's body was sprawled over the two front seats. The music still drowning out his thoughts.  
  
When I blur my eyes, they make the whole  
World breath - I see you fucking me  
And I am absolutely controlling every urge  
To mutilate - the one and only answer  
So much for memories...  
I wanna dress in your insecurities  
And be the perfect you - I'm through  
I'm out-stretched out for all to loathe  
Here we go - the ultimate irony  
  
The music played softly, loud noises would only make it worse for him. Two hours had passed since Kane had just silently left the arena. And those two hours had been hell.  
  
Give me what I could never ask for  
Connect me and you could be my chemical no  
Give me the drug you know I'm after  
Connect me and you could be my chemical  
  
He lay still in the dark, not wanting to leave the locker room. The door opened slowly, jumping up hoping to see the seven foot man with the red and black mask stood there, he was instead greeted by Scott Steiner ."You've not had the radio on have you?"  
  
"No why?"  
  
"Well, I've got some bad news...." 


	9. If he survives

The atmosphere was dreary, the wait was tormenting. So many feelings playing around inside The Undertaker as he waited, and waited. Kurt gave his shoulder a little squeeze, knowing the pain of waiting in a hospital, surrounded by silence as the wait to find out if a loved one has a chance of surviving the worst killed you slowly. A nurse, her face solemn, not able to hide her true feelings, readable like an open book, Kurt and Taker stood, their hearts sank. "You are Kane's brother right?"  
  
"That's right, this is my partner" Kurt nodded at Undertaker statement.  
  
"Okay, I'm afraid he's in theatre at the moment, but if you would like to follow me into my office we'll discuss this more privately." Her blonde hair tied back in a bun shook as she walked, the two much larger men following her.  
  
A loud bang of a door slamming turned the attention of the three people. Down the corridor the receptionist was alarmed to find she was dealing with a hysterical patient. "Kane! He's called Kane! He....wears a mask! WWE wrestler! My tag team partner! Please is he here!? Is he alright?!? Please say he's alive!" The panic and fear swirled in his eyes; a large hand grabbed his shoulder. He turned, looked up into the jade eyes of The Undertaker. "Hey." Mark knew exactly how Kane felt about Rob, he saw it in his little brothers eye every match he watched on Raw with them together. He saw the same thing in Rob's eyes and knew it was true. "Calm down, come with us. Were going to find out how he is" Rob slowly nodded. He felt Kurt's arm around his shoulder as they walked down the white corridor. "He'll be fine. He's strong"  
  
The pokey office was cramped but they didn't care. Kurt waited outside, while Rob sat down on a chair next to Taker. "He's being taken to intensive care....if he survives theatre"  
  
"What do you mean if!" Rob yelled  
  
"He's condition is critical, he may not survive. So far, they have had to amputed his left leg"  
  
The sentence hit them both like a bullet to the heart. "His leg..." Rob's voice trembling, barley above a whisper. Undertaker shook his head, the realism of the situation, the seriousness grabbed him, shook him violently.  
  
"He's a wrestler, how the hell is he going to cope without a leg!?"  
  
"I'm sorry but that's the consequence..."  
  
"CONSEQUENCE? KANE'S LIFE HAS BEEN FILLED WITH BAD CONSEQUENCES YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! YOU HAVE TO SAVE HIM! You have..to...please" He broke down, Undertaker comforted him, holding him, but it was nothing compared to the way Kane held him, comforted him....loved him.  
  
:::Beep::::Beep::::  
  
Rob, I love you....I love you Rob Van Dam.  
  
:::::Beep:::::Beep:::::  
  
AUTHORS NOTE: Sorry it was a really short chapeter but I have a bit of writers block for this story but I will continue know I've finally wrote something! Please read and review! 


	10. I'll be waiting, promise

"Don't think I'm crazy or nothing like that but sometimes, when it gets dark, and I'm alone, I long for the light. The dark, it brings back too many painful memories, I can't face them sometimes ya know" His head snuggled in deeper into the crook of the others neck, nuzzling him comfortably, lovingly.  
  
"Memories, yeah there awful things, I sometimes which I could forget, they only seem to come and haunt you when your alone though"  
  
"Are you okay Rob?"  
  
"Me, I'm more worried about you, how are you going to cope, without a leg, or how am I going to cope If you don't survive" Rob leaned back onto his hands, Kane sat up, his long curly hair brushed lightly down his shoulders. There was no wind, no warmth, strangely no cold.  
  
The bubbling stream splashed against the bank, the sun shone down as it set behind the meadow of trees. Fields of flowers outstretched as far as the eye could see, their colours bright against the sun's rays. Smudges of orange, red and yellow across the horizon made a smile crease against Rob's lips, tranquillity, peace and Kane.  
  
Rob watched Kane stand, his black with red belts outfit. The outfit Kane was wearing when Rob first spoke to him as a friend. He contently admired him as he walked a few steps forward, both his legs in tact. "Where are we Kane?"  
  
"I'm not sure" He hung his head; turning to Rob he reluctantly had to ask the next question. "If I die, will you please do me one thing? Forget me. Move on with you're life, win the championship off Hunter, make something of your life"  
  
"Kane!" Rob jumped up; his bare feet met the lush green grass. "I will never forget you, I would never want to..." Rob's head was bowed, two strong arms wrapped around him pulling him into a tight embrace.  
  
"Thank you." The two parted, interlocked fingers they gazed into each others eyes like they had only just fallen in love, even though each of them has loved the other longer than they could remember. Kane let go and turned to face the stream. "I'm sorry Rob, but I think this may be the last time we spend together." He turned back, his eyes filled with crimson liquid. A single drop fell and landed into his left hand.  
  
"Blood" Rob whispered. "No" He shook his head. Kane clenched his fingers over the drop then opened them, a red feather floated up into the air; Rob watched it before reaching up and catching it.  
  
"If we want to be together, this is where we'll meet."  
  
"Kane"  
  
"Only at night, if you come here, I'll be here waiting. Always..."  
  
"Please Kane"  
  
"This is our place, for us, to meet. To be together...come here and I'll meet you I promise"  
  
Opening his eyes the bright white light blinded him, he sat up from his outstretched position over three chairs. His neck ached and the pain in his right shoulder was dire. (The hospital? The meadow was just a dream..Kane was just a dream) He stood and looked at the two other wwe wrestlers fast asleep in each others arms.  
  
Slowly, he stretched his fingers out and there in the middle of his palm was a red feather.  
  
"Excuse me, Rob isn't it?"  
  
"Yeah, how's Kane is he alright? He's alive isn't he?"  
  
The nurse tried to smile, but her eyes told the real story. Deep with sorrow she held out her hand.  
  
"Would you like to see him?" She asked, Rob nodded and followed her to the intensive care unit. 


	11. Prayers are with you and plans

"Well, King there's lot more on the show still t come but right now we would like to take this opportunity to wish our wrestler Kane a very speedy and healthy recovery from an accident which should never have happened folks"  
  
"Yeah Kane, if you're well enough and your watching, get well soon we miss you and if you've just tuned in we were informed earlier that Undertaker is with younger brother Kane who is in intensive care unit after an horrific car accident"  
  
"Our thoughts and prayers our with ya' Kane and ya' family"  
  
Never before have I experienced such emotions. If I wasn't feeling scared I was feeling nervous, if not that I tried to be optimistic, you know everything's cool when you're Rob Van Dam. Well, I thought that until I approached the room he was lying in, motionless, full of wires..machines bleeping slowly. Then I realised, not today, not any day soon, it's not cool. I'm in a nightmare, I want to wake up and have Kane hold me, tell me it's alright its over, but I know that's not going to happen.  
  
The door opened and he had to step through it. Closing his eyes, not wanting to see what the car wreck had done to him. H re-opened them and stood, he felt like ice. Frozen in a part of time he did not want to be in. But there, lying in unconsciousness not knowing the torment that Rob was going through, as Kane.  
  
The room was cold, the walls bare, just filled with technical gear to keep Kane alive. The whole room smelt of that famous hospital smell that makes you want to leave before you even get inside. Deep inside Rob knew that since he tried to tell Kane how he truly feels everything was going wrong. Now had to be the best time, in the quiet were only Kane could listen to him. Reaching over he touched the bigger man's hand.  
  
"You're beautiful. I mean that, so..beautiful. I know this isn't the way you wanted me to see you're face but I've seen it now and I tell you something, how could you hide it from me dude!" He chuckled as he tried to fight off tears.  
  
"You know how much I care about you, I feel like I could go and end my own life just to save yours. Not that it would but you know what I mean. I love you. I have done or so long, you won my heart and you hold it now, its yours. I didn't leave you; I got stuck in a bloody lift! I would never leave you. And I never shredded up your stuff, you know I would never be so low." His face reddened as tears streamed down his cheeks. "Please don't leave me, I love you, I need you"  
  
Undertaker stood looking in through the window, watching Rob cry onto Kane's arm. Kurt gave his hand a squeeze. "Do you think Kane would mind me and Rob saw his face?"  
  
"I can sense it" His jade eyes glazed over and he looked away from the room. He leaned back on the window, his face now buried in his hands.  
  
"Hey, hey" Kurt wrapped his arms around the deadman's waist. "Come on, Kane's going to be fine babe you'll see. Now what can you sense that's made you this upset?"  
  
"Imminent Death"  
  
Mean while, back at the RAW event..  
  
"Well, that's our plan down the shit." Ric Flair punched the wall. He turned and faced the rest of Evolution. "What the hell are we going to do now?"  
  
"I'm thinking, I'm thinking!" Triple H snapped back. "Listen Kane would have been perfect, if I could have got him to trust me, love me. He would have done anything for me"  
  
"Yeah that was the plan Hunter, but now we can't cos' his fucked up in a hospital!" Bautista growled.  
  
"I know that! So, all we need now is someone just as gullible, someone just as innocent in their own way. So plan would still work."  
  
"I know what you mean" Ric leaned against the door. "But who?"  
  
Bautista paced the locker room, his bare feet pattered against the tiles. Stopping, he looked towards Triple H. "What about Rob Van Dam? He liked Kane right, if Kane snuffs it, then he'll be emotionally crippled. Someone helps him get over Kane's death Rob falls in love with them doesn't want to lose them like he lost Kane, so he does anything they want"  
  
Hunter's face lit up, the smile on Ric's grew and they both leaped forward. "That is brilliant!" Hunter wrapped an arm round Bautista's shoulder. Ric patted him proudly on the back. "Which one of us though?" The three men frowned at each other, and then smiled in unison; they turned and looked at the fourth member of Evolution.  
  
He sat on the floor quietly singing to himself to his walkman. He felt the stares of the three older men on his back like burning coal, looking up he pulled out his ear pieces and scowled "What?" 


	12. Its over

The silence in the room was constantly interrupted by the bleeping machine. Kane laid still, the ventilator inside his slightly open mouth, the life support machine working over time. A shaking hand gripped his tightly. Rob raised it and kissed the back. A wire inserted in Kane's vain, more wires attached to his chest. Rob followed them, his eyes puffy, blood shot and pink. "Hey Kane, we had a wrestling match on the t.v. earlier. I thought you might wake up; watch a bit with me, but you never. You just laid there. Come on dude, I don't know what the other wrestler's will do without you. Always giving advice, always there for them, for me. I can't cope without you. Please come on get stronger, Kane be strong"  
  
The door opened. A small, round-ish man with black hair and a black moustache walked in. In his hand he was clutching a black bag. He stood still as he stared; he bit back tears and cleared his throat. Tuning to the Undertaker, dropping the bag he kicked it across to him. "They just rang me. Oh Mr Bearer you're youngest son Kane is in hospital in a critical condition." He forced out a fake laugh. "Nice of them, so that's what's become of him. Lying, unable to breathe for himself, so close to death and I have to watch him. I never thought either of you would die before me" Undertaker sat the other side of his brother, he stared at his face.  
  
"Bro, what ya' looking at?" His green eyes opened as he saw the smiling face of his young brother. His cheeky grin brought a warm smile to Mark's lips. "Come here Kane sit on my knee and tell me all about nursery" Kane climbed onto his knee. The snow on the floor had been scraped away by Mark's feet as he swung back and forth on the swing. Light snowflakes fell gently on the two boys. The darkening sky lit up a little with the twinkling stars. Mark wrapped his coat around Kane and cradled him in his arms, gently swinging as he cooed Kane to sleep. Moving a brush of hair out of his tiny closed eye, Mark leaned over and whispered. "I promise, I will never let anything, anything! Hurt you in anyway." He kissed his small forehead. Standing up, still clinging onto Kane who silently slept in sweet slumber, away from harm, away from worries, in a land of carefree dreams of meadows and feathers. Mark walked in the snow, back to the warmth of their house where he'd put Kane to bed, stroking his hair as he slept. "Nothing will happen to you as long as I live"  
  
::Bleep::Bleep::  
  
"I promised Kane, and I failed"  
  
Rob looked up, his eyes glazed over. "What did you promise him?"  
  
"He'd never be hurt as long as I live, now look what's happened!"  
  
Undertaker opened the bag Paul had brought, inside was a picture. The only family picture they ever had taken. Their mother, stood pouting, she never was a smiling person, always the model. Paul stood proudly above his boys, then Mark, arms tightly around the little waist of the five year old. Mark laughed. "We never had our picture's took. Kane was always ill; he could never find the strength to get up for them. Once a month, he'd go through this phase where he'd be perfectly well, seemed as though nothing was wrong with him. I called it Heaven time. Then, he'd be back, bed bound but always smiling."  
  
Rob leaned over and kissed Kane's cheek. "He's as cold as ice." Paul frowned.  
  
"You can't tell me Kane's gay as well"  
  
"Shut up Dad!" Mark yelled. The nurse with the blonde hair in the bun carefully opened the door. She walked in, and motioned for Undertaker to sit down. "Please, it's best you sit down."  
  
"What's going on?" Rob voice trembled. "I'm sorry, Kane's officially brain dead. His basically nothing, it would be best if you gave us your permission to turn off his life support machine, so he can be at rest" 


	13. What should i do?

It had been so hard for them all to cope with another superstar death, although not many knew him well enough to say he was a true friend, he always gave advice and was never bitter, angry or big headed in anyway. Hurricane asked for the week off to come to terms with the death of his friend, to him, when he and Kane won the tag titles, it was one of his greatest moments. Jericho wasn't talkative as usual, in fact he was deadly silent, he run his match, didn't even use the mic, people knew he was effected badly. The Dudley's, Christian, Booker T and Bradshaw talked about the times they had with him and how he always made them laugh even if he wasn't trying to.  
  
The whole locker room of girls cried open heartedly. Many had not even imagined it were possible for one of them to die, they all had an illusion wrote out in their minds that they would all be around forever as a team. Undertaker stayed at home, Paul stayed with them arranging the funeral. Sara didn't speak, she, unlike Jericho, had been struck mute with shock. The three of them received flowers from all the Raw and Smackdown crews, Paul did from his mortuary and so did Sara from her work place. The house was full to the brim with flowers.  
  
Rob opened the door to the canteen; it was empty apart from one man. He had been there for Rob, an unsuspecting friend he never knew he had. He let him cry, he let him talk as he just listened. Rob couldn't possibly imagine how kind and gentle Randy could really be. Randy looked up, his expression shocked. "Rob! What are you doing here? You're not in the right frame of mind to be at work" So nice, it was unreal how the one person he loved could be taken from him so cruelly but he was offered another friend in return. Maybe in time......  
  
"No man, I had to come, I can't sit around thinking about him all the time, and he'd kick my ass if he knew I was doing that" Rob made a weak smile as Randy motioned for him to sit beside him.  
  
"Don't worry Rob, I'll always be here for you......always" His voice seemed certain, Rob gave him a questioning look.  
  
"I know that what I'm about to tell you will be hard and it isn't fair that I'm going to tell you but I have too, its eating away at me from the inside and seeing you everyday has made me realize, I don't want to lose you. I love you. I have adored you from a distance but I saw the chemistry between you and Kane so I let you be. That didn't change how I felt, and I still feel it now. You don't have to say anything, and if you don't want to be friends anymore I'll understand"  
  
Rob stared at him, emotions running erratically through his body, his thoughts so wild he could not tame them. (It's so soon, too soon, I don't know......I'm sorry Kane)  
  
Randy wrapped his arms around Rob's waist and pulled him into a tight embrace; Rob rested his head on Randy's chest and squeezed him tightly. Tears swelled in his eyes as Randy stroked his hair. Rob looked up slightly and through the blur of tears, he saw floating down to the floor as if heavy, full of heavy thoughts, emotions and pain, a red feather.  
  
Rob pulled away. He didn't look at Randy he just turned and ran, as fast as his legs would allow, Randy called his name but he didn't look back. He dodged people, whacked into people and pushed people over, he didn't know where he was running too or what exactly he was running from but he just ran with his instinct. Eventually he arrived at his hotel room, he fell onto his bed with exhaustion, his breath fast and in heavy rasps and he tried to control it, and he was worn out. But he knew if he fell asleep, he would go to the meadow and he'd be there.  
  
"Why am I so scared of you Kane, I thought I'd always be with you. But now I don't want to see you, is this......Randy's fault? Do I even like Randy? I must do......because I'm thinking about him not you Kane. Did you send that feather so I would remember you? So I would let go of Randy and tell him I still loved you? You don't want me to move on! That's your problem!" He fell onto the floor hitting it hard with his clenched fist till it turned red, he couldn't stay awake anymore, as if he was being forced into slumber, he collapsed on the floor into sleep.  
  
The meadow hadn't changed; the sun was still so bright and colorful while the heat could not be felt. He walked further into the field of lush green grass and approached the bubbling stream. He heard footsteps, and then they stopped. He turned, his heart jumped beats and he suddenly felt tingles through his body. Kane coaxed a smile, Rob did too. Kane held back his urge to grab the smaller man and kiss him till his lips were bruised. "Listen Rob I know you're angry at me......"  
  
"Angry? You made me feel awful! Leaving Randy high and dry like that and for what? A dead guy I'll never be able to have!'  
  
Kane cringed, that hurt but he never showed it. "I brought you here because I need to tell you something about Randy he-......."  
  
"Don't spout any crap at me Kane! He is charming and he likes me and you are jealous!"  
  
"No Rob please listen........"  
  
"You listen; you are jealous but guess what? You're also dead! You died! You left me all alone.......and now you are spoiling my life because you can't come to terms with your death!" Tears fell down his face as Kane watched him run again. Rob seemed to be doing a lot of running from him. He watched tiny droplets of blood fall from his eyes onto the grass as a lady walked beside him. Her chin length brown hair was wavy, her skin as white and fresh as water lily's, her lips small and red as a rose but her eyes were startling one eye was green, the other blue. Just like Kane's. She placed her hand on Kane's. He looked at her.  
  
"He won't listen. He's going to fall for their trap. What should I do mother?" 


	14. Falling further

His eyes burned as he opened them, stinging from the tears he had not wanted to cry, tears, more pain caused by Kane, he closed them again moaning loudly. No matter how hard he tried to stay awake, he knew that he would make himself ill and eventually he would face the evitable and crash down into the land of nod, then 'wake' in the meadow. He'd once again hear the bubbling stream, feel the fresh, cold grass on his bare feet and see _him_.  
  
Gripping the pillow with a feeble grip, so weakly he felt ashamed but he refused to cry. He wouldn't waste anymore tears on the big red machine. He didn't deserve them, after all he left him. It was his own fault he was killed, at least he wanted to believe that. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw the masked man's smile, his bright eyes glowing with life. A life that was ripped away from him, torn into a thousand pieces without so much of a care as to how anyone would feel. Especially Kane himself.  
  
Inside the hotel room of Evaluation the plan continued to develop, Hunter ran the brush threw the long, blonde hair that was famous for looking wet as he wrestled, smirking he carried on chewing his gum. This was going to work, and it would be all his. All of it, every thing, every one, he would own them. Batista continued to watch him, his face never showed emotion. Which was entirely a good thing, the way he was feeling about this whole plan, this whole scheme, would surely have him killed. He stayed silent; at least he wasn't the one who had to convince RVD. Glancing over at the youngest member of the group who for some bizarre reason didn't seemed fazed; Ric was talking him through things to say and how to react to things Rob might say.  
  
"Don't forget he's going to need softening up first." Hunter walked over to them, Batista following.  
  
"Yeah that's the bit I'm not looking forward to. Do you know how hard it is to pretend I love someone I don't even like, especially with the added bonus that he's a bloke" Randy raised his voice towards the end, folding his arms with a grunt.  
  
Rob raised his head slightly, the glow from the clock was too bright but he managed to make out the time 10:04 am Why was he still here? Why hadn't God decided he didn't deserve to live? Just like he had Kane. It wasn't fair, the agony wrapped itself around Rob squeezing him tighter until he'd burst. Feelings pent up inside him, all negative. Anger, pain, hurt, sadness, grief and sorrow. Why did he hate Kane? Did he hate him?  
  
Without a thought he grabbed the golden door handle, pushing it down and heaving the door open. Walking inside he was about to call out the other mans name but he stopped himself. The room was a mess, the bed covers were hanging on over the side of the bed, there was sick on the floor which, judging by the smell of the room, had been there all night. The curtains were still drawn allowing no light to seep into the dark room, the balcony doors wide open however allowing the howling winds of the bitter morning blow into the freezing hotel room, whatever had been on the bedside table was now thrown all over the floor, and laying in the middle of the bed looking as though he'd been living in a jungle for three weeks without food, was Rob.  
  
"Rob!" Randy jumped over the mess on the floor and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling the smaller man into a tight embrace. "Oh Rob" he cooed. "Please don't keep doing this to yourself, people adore you, I adore you, you need to move on, please let me help you" Rob didn't say anything, he allowed himself to be gently rocked in the arms of the other man. This was all he wanted, love comfort, hope....but with Kane.  
  
His clenched his fist till the point were if he were alive, they'd turn white. The anger blazed profusely in his once so gentle eyes. He was falling further into their trap, and Kane knew he couldn't do a damn thing about it. Rob wouldn't listen to him in his dreams, and there was no way he could get through to him in this world....he looked over at a photo on table near the balcony doors. He walked over to it, a gust of wind blew into the room but Kane couldn't feel it. A picture...of himself, Rob and Undertaker. _Undertaker_...Kane turned and glance over at the man he loved knowing what he had to do he left as silently as he appeared.


	15. Plan spoken!

Cold water splashed against his reddened face, his funeral is tomorrow. How can this be happening? He isn't meant to bury his brother, his younger brother, its meant to be the other way round in forty odd years time.

"I won't cry, I promise Kane for you I'll be strong" He looked at himself directly in the mirror, his jade eyes dim with doubt at himself. Suddenly a wave of fatigue struck him, he began to stumble on his own feet, falling backwards into a cubicle thank fully no one was in. He fell, back smacking off the tiled floor of the men's toilets. Eyes closing he couldn't control himself falling to sleep.

Hunter shook himself trying to shake in confidence. "This is it, we don't have much time, and tonight's the night"

Ric breathed in deeply then exhaled loudly. "This is gonna work" He grinned.

Batista sat staring at the ground, his mind running erratic with complications to the plan, mainly his guilt, a feeling of sorrow took over, and he decided to speak up.

"H, don't you feel the least bit distressed at the fact you're going to, kill your wife?"

Hunter and Ric both let out raucous laughs. "No way, I only married her so this plan would work."

"Side it's not just her that's gonna die, it's the other three McMahon's as well!"

"Plus I'm not the one who's doing the killing, Rob Van Dam is. So, Randy is there with him now, the plan is Randy convinces Rob that the McMahon's are going out and need a limo driver, convinces Rob to do it. Brakes have been completely smashed by the nature boy himself and there are no seat belts...fantastic."

"What happens if they all live, or one of them lives, or Rob dies?" Batista was trying, they needed to see sense.

"Well Rob's a minor sacrifice, besides he'll die exactly like his beloved one Kane" He spoke in a mocking tone.

(His greed's taken over him completely.) Batista thought his head shaking as the other two members of Evolution danced around chanting were going to own the wwe.

A low groan rumbled in his throat, what had happened? He pushed himself up on his elbows, the feeling of soft fresh grass tingled his fingers, the flowing of a small stream bubbled and bashed against rocks. This definitely wasn't the men's toilets. The sun beamed down its blazing rays relentlessly, but he could feel no heat, the evergreen trees swished and danced gently to silent music, though there was no wind. Standing up he continued to look around in a daze, confusion sparkled across his face. He heard footsteps behind him, turning he realized he was dreaming.

"Mother..."

She smiled, raising a hand up to touch his cheek her heart melted as she saw her eldest son for the first time in many, many years. "Hello Mark"

She was there, standing before him, as real as the light of day. Her eyes glowing vibrantly, her face a picture of happiness. The same as it was the very day she died.

"Kane is here, he brought you to this meadow, however he's losing his life in this realm as well."

"I don't understand"

"Well we can't keep bringing people here to often, it destroys our soul, but I don't care if it kills me for a second time, Rob needs this"

Undertaker turned to see him again; standing before his very eyes was the brother he thought he'd never see again.

"This...is..."

"Weird? Our family has always been weird." Kane rolled his eyes. _Randy is there with him now. _Kane's eyes widened, he beckoned for Mark to follow him "listen I need your help..."

Inside Rob's mind he was dreaming that it was Kane. His lips so soft against his, gentle, timid kisses between mumbles of I love you and careful caresses. Lips bruised against his again, teeth bashed his own and an unwanted tongue invaded his mouth. Pulling away fast, Randy's smile was bigger than usual. "Hey would you do me the biggest favor? The McMahon's are going out on this major dinner date and there were no limo drivers available. I said I'd do it, only I have a meeting with Evolution I can't miss. Would you, drive there limo for me? Please......!"

There was a lingering pause, a deafening silence. Rob spoke "Sure"

Author note: Okay that chapter was horrible. The next will be much better I promise! I know Undertaker and Kane don't have the same mum but I decided for the sake of this story they will. Hope you enjoy the story.

Irvine Leonhart (a.ka. Kane and RVD eva)


End file.
